Moonshine Lunch Run 2017
Nine riders, mostly of the gnarled and weather-beaten Iron Butt variety, were scheduled to meet at 5:15 at a location near Chicago's O'Hare Airport for a 5:30 departure to the unincorporated town of Moonshine, IL, (Population 2).
For those who are not familiar, a brief history of the Moonshine Lunch Run can be found here
History - Moonshine Lunch Run, but think of, oh about, 2,000 riders from all parts of the U.S. converging at intersection of farm roads E 300th Rd. and N 600th St. in Clark County, IL. -- otherwise known as the address of The Middle of Nowhere. On one corner of the intersection is the Moonshine Store, a wood-floored general store straight out of the early 20th century. The Moonshine Store sells a lot of general store sorts of things, but they also cook up some of the best hamburgers in the U.S., called "Moonburgers", and those burgers are the reason for the mass convergence.
Yes, there are other reasons: Moonshine Store is an official IBA checkpoint so many riders are finishing their Saddle Sore 1000 or Butt Burner 1500 there and it has become a great fundraising tool for local charities. At its heart, though, the Moonshine Lunch Run is all about the burgers.
The nine riders departed at 5:28. I was not with them.
At 5:28, I was removing the battery from my wife's Honda CTX because my bike's battery appeared to be dead, or at least on life support. I thought about jumping it, but it seemed to be simpler to do the swap and deal with the battery issue later on. I think I did a pretty quick swap considering it was still dark outside. I was a little surprised how hard it was to dislodge the old battery and reinstall the new one; the space is really tight. I guess I finally got on the road at about 5:45, I think. I wasn't sure because my phone was in my pocket and my clock now read 1:10am.
I rode to the O'Hare Oasis (a rest area on I-294 near the airport), but as I suspected, they were long gone so I just rolled back on to I-294 and headed south. I did some calculations in my head: "If a group of motorcyclists left a rest area at 5:30 traveling at 70mph and Johnny left the same rest area at 6:00 traveling at 80mph, how long..." I figured I might catch them about halfway there if I rode fast and kept my gas stops short. The problem was, though, that I had not the foggiest notion of what route they were taking. I recalled from previous runs, that we would pick up Jorge en route. I thought that they did this somewhere along IL394/IL1. Turns out that I was correct that they stopped to pick up Jorge, but incorrect on where they picked him up. I still don't really know their route, but I was now fully committed to IL1 and to getting to MLR as quickly as I could.
Illinois Highway 1 is pretty straight and hits a lot of towns. None of it looked familiar so I knew this wasn't the route they were on, but traveling solo allowed me to make pretty good time especially when it came to passing slower traffic--and ALL of it was slower traffic. Let me just say that I made VERY good time. I only got slowed up just about 15 miles from Moonshine by a group of Harleys and really, really short passing zone, but I realized that they were heading to MLR, too and since they seemed to know where they were going and I not so much, I followed them in.
My Harley escort was met about 1/4 mile from the Moonshine Store by a volunteer in a High-Viz vest and were directed to park at the end of the line of bikes stretching from this point to the store and then stretched out in equal lengths in the other three directions. Taking a page from Fran's , the leader of the ride I missed, playbook and I just manuevered around the parking Harleys all the way to the store. Once there, another High-Viz vest suggested I turn right away from the store, but I spied a spot directly across from the store and I used the "my bike doesn't take up much space and can fit right THERE" rationale and he let me park there.
Fran and the other eight riders were just sitting down to eat when I arrived. I was about 10 minutes behind them. I might have caught them had I been on the right route, but then again, I kind of liked moving at my own pace and seeing downtown Danville and Watseka. I ordered two burgers with cheese (there was a huge line if you wanted bacon so I sacrificed and just got burgers).
One of the coolest things is that you order your food, get your chips and or drinks, find a picnic table and eat. After you're finished, you toss your stuff out and then you get in another line and they ask you what you had. No check, no paying in advance. Just the honor system.
The weather was as good as the burgers, so there was a large turnout of bikers. I heard later that 2017 was a record year for MLR as they sold 3362 burgers.
After eating, we regrouped at the next intersection to the north, Fran told us where we would stop for gas and that the ride officially ended when we merged on to I-55 somewhere a little south of Joliet. Sounded good to me.
I was not kidding that this was the address to The Middle of Nowhere...
I somehow managed to get into the second spot in line for the last leg of our return trip. While on I-55 in reasonably heavy, but fast moving traffic, Fran pointed to his head and then back at me. He did this twice. I assumed he wanted me to lead so I pulled ahead and took the lead. I lead this group for about 15 miles and the individuals began peeling off to their exits. When Fran pulled off, he pointed to his head again and wave to me. I rode on toward home with only one rider behind me. Jay lives in my town and was the only Harley rider in the bunch. We both exited at the same exit and he turned off on his street. I rode to the gas station, filled up, and went home.
I began to think about Fran's gesture and wondered if he was irritated with me for some reason rather than wanting me to lead. I don't know why I wondered that, but I decided to email him to find out. He replied that I lead fine, but that his gesture was to tell me that my headlight was out. Turns out that the high beam stopped working but it was sunny and I didn't notice that it was out. I know it worked when I left home. I find it odd that I had a USB port added last week and the battery died and the headlight failed on the same day. Coincidence, I'm sure, but I'm probably getting a new batter regardless.
489 miles later, with a burnt out headlight and stolen battery, I arrived home. I poured a bourbon, lit a cigar, and popped on some Van Morrison and relaxed in my backyard. It was a marvelous night for a moondance.